The holiday diet
1. If no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.
2. If you drink a diet soda while eatin a candy bar, they cancel each other out.
3. When eating with a friend, the calories are cancelled out if y’all eat the same amount.
4. Foods used as medicines don’t have no calories. i.e. chocolate used for energy, cheesecake eaten whole, and ice cream eaten anytime.
5. Movie or TV related foods have no calories as they are part of the entertainment experience.
6. Cookie pieces contain no calories, because the calories leaked out when they got broke.
7. If you eat the food off someone elses plate, it don’t count. It’s their calories, not yours.
8. If y’all eat standin up, it all goes to your feet and gets walked off.
9. Food eaten at Holiday dinners have no calories, as everyone talks so much that it all gets cancelled out.
10. STRESSED is just DESSERT spelled backwards, don’t ya know! So do it right and eat the dessert so you don’t get stressed.
Now I warn you this diet was designed by your treadmill or whichever exercise machine you use to get more attention.
Have a great day everyone!
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“When eating with a friend, the calories are cancelled out if y’all eat the same amount.” It’s true! And the guilt that you’d normally have about eating your own weight in cheese gets cancelled out too!! Lol. Or is that one just me?
hehe, now THAT’s what I’m talking about!
Foods eaten in the car don’t count because the calories are left where eaten and don’t follow you to your destination. So, no worries on holiday travels!
6. Cookie pieces contain no calories, because the calories leaked out when they got broke.
No wonder I love broken cookies!!
hehehe funny~!